What is my motivation?

I wish I could say I was sorry for not blogging but I was spending time with family {which I truly needed! } Oh and did I mention I loved every moment of it? Lately I have been having issues of finding time, I mean motivation to do what I need to do. Here I am a couple of days in and I have already lost my motivation. I have been hit by the motivation stick of a wedding and school and yet I still cannot find myself working out! {or eating right, that’s right I am thinking of the brownie I ate on Tuesday} I think I am going to get my before and after pictures printed so I can remember what I will be returning to.
I am right now currently planning my grocery list for next week, {we do not get paid until the 5th so no grocery shopping until then} I have learned that if I have a plan I do way better then if I say ok I am going to do this and that. Maybe that is what I will work on the remainder of the week. { I am a planner and list taker by nature as it is anyway, so might as well} .
One last note last night Guapo, Monkey and I went night swimming. It was so nice to have the pool to our selves.{ I was also grateful that I had shaved my legs} I swam some laps with monkey on back, did some hand stands and had a water fight. All in all the night was full of fulfillment. It reminded me of one of the reason I wanted to be a skinny mama, so I could enjoy the sweetest family moments that are apart of my life.

R.I.P

Sugar. There is no denying that I have come to love it. I feel that even though I have strong emotions towards it that it is time to let it go and to go sugar free. {I can’t believe I am even doing this ekk!} The time has come to do this. I made this decision as I look at my favorite brownie recipe. So yummy and chocolately. Hopefully one day I can come back without over doing it. {I am also wishing I just didn’t buy a 12 pack of soda. Ahh.} I guess the thing to do in a moment like this is to think about the positives…let see:
Positive #1
Feeling better in the long run.{ I have PCOS and the last time I gave up Sugar my cyst went bye bye. }
Positive#2
Weight loss is more achievable. {considering how many empty calories sugary foods consist of .}
Positive# 3
It will save money on my grocery bill. {Never a bad thing}
Positive#4
I will finish more projects. { Since I won’t constantly be snacking}
Positive#5
I will be able to tone my cooking skills. {This will help me cook healthier when it comes to desserts.}
In the end I think it will be a good thing. I already have Monkey trained from the last time I gave up sugar. { She still yells…” that has sugar in it, and you can’t have it mommy“} I think this is going to be more of a mental challenge, I hope I am ready. I mean I know I am ready. {Wink, Wink}

Really?! Why did I eat that!

I totally just ate three Oreo cookies…{ugh the shame!} The sad thing about this is, I don’t even like Oreo cookies! {Is true the texture grosses me out not to mention the flavor}. This brings me to a conclusion I ate for two reasons:

1) I passed them,

2) I am bored.

So when things like this happen I turn to hobbies, I found in my past success that a good hobby for weight loss is, something you can do with your hands. It can help train a person to start understand hunger signals. {So this is what I have to resort to} when I think I am hungry or bored, I will pick up my crochet hooks and turn on a good movie, if I am still hungry after I crochet for a half an hour! and then I will eat.{Yummy} That sounds so simple! Although we all know it is much harder when you feel buried under junk food. So in honor of Saturday and simply because I can; here is a recipe for a healthier cookie: {I have yet to make this but it looked yummy if you bake it let me know what you think}

Mudslide Cookies from Cooking Light Magazine

Ingredients
1 1/2 tablespoons butter
2 ounces bittersweet chocolate, coarsely chopped
2 ounces unsweetened chocolate, coarsely chopped
1 tablespoon instant coffee granules
1 tablespoon hot water
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (about 6 3/4 ounces)
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 1/2 cups sugar
1/2 cup egg substitute
2 large eggs
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1/4 cup semisweet chocolate minichips
Preparation
Preheat oven to 350°.
Place butter, bittersweet chocolate, and unsweetened chocolate into a microwave-safe bowl; microwave at HIGH 1 minute or until chocolate is almost melted. Stir until smooth. Combine coffee granules and 1 tablespoon hot water, stirring until granules dissolve. Stir coffee and vanilla into chocolate mixture.
Lightly spoon flour into dry measuring cups; level with a knife. Combine flour, cocoa, baking powder, and salt, stirring well with a whisk. Combine sugar, egg substitute, and eggs in a large bowl; beat with a mixer at high speed 6 minutes or until thick and pale. Gently stir 1/4 of egg mixture into chocolate mixture; stir chocolate mixture into remaining egg mixture. Stir in flour mixture, nuts, and chocolate chips.
Cover baking sheets with parchment paper. Drop dough by rounded tablespoonfuls 2 inches apart on prepared baking sheets; with moist hands, gently press dough into 1/4-inch-thick rounds. Bake at 350° for 15 minutes or until set. Cool 1 minute. Remove from pans; cool completely on wire racks.
Note: When the cookies are done, they'll be cracked on top and still moist in the center.
Debbie Calhoun, Cooking Light
JANUARY 2007
Nutritional Information

Amount per serving
Calories: 142
Calories from fat: 29%
Fat: 4.7g
Saturated fat: 2g
Monounsaturated fat: 1g
Polyunsaturated fat: 1.1g
Protein: 2.5g
Carbohydrate: 25.2g
Fiber: 1.3g
Cholesterol: 16mg
Iron: 1.1mg
Sodium: 59mg
Calcium: 29mg

The Now

Here is where I am at:
I am 27 I have lost 55lbs and have gained back 5 due to a recent much needed self indulging vacation. So I need to lose 30lbs well now 35lbs . I am in school to try and get an education in nutrition and physical fitness. So my weight obviously needs to come off; since this year I am not doing school over the internet. This gives me a little under three months, which is roughly about 10lbs a month. This also means I need to put down the cookie which is in my hand. {Insert guilty expression here.} I have a cute little family. A husband I call Guapo because that is what he is…{handsome}. I also have the most adorable little girl in the world! She also just happens to be an aspiring monkey; which is why I call her {Monkey}. So this is what I have come to realize about myself : I am a creature of habit which is why my indulging vacation has caused problems in its aftermath. I ate the best of junk food and now I don’t want to stop! {who would with all the awesome processed tastiness!} So I need to get my head back into the game and find a way to hold myself accountable. {Insert Blog Here} I have the knowledge {Thank you school}, the want and the need. {Which knowing me I will dive into further down the road}.

Skip to here if not interested in reading what is above.

The Goal: 30lbs by August 18 2011
The How: Getting rid of the junk food {I would allow myself a mourning period but that always backfires} eating healthy and exercising.
The How to make the plan STICK: Following the weight loss plan that I have already have { Written by me for a health class project…incase you are wondering it does work I have friends who have lost 20lbs in a couple of months} I will explain more I promise!

In the end I hope to inspire and educate throughout this fun little journey I call my life!